Tips To Help Your Special Needs Child Survive The Holiday Season

It seems as though I just finished explaining to my family about Halloween, and why we do not dress up and trick-or-treat!

What? They gasp every year, 'Kaitlin is missing out on a treasured childhood experience?!'

For starters, my daughter has an eating disorder; she has a feeding tube, she does not like, nor can she tolerate candy. She can have the occasional lollipop, which she has the opportunity to enjoy year-round.

And secondly, my daughter does not comprehend going to someone's house and not going in, because that's what we do right?

Then BAM, we are catapulted into the holiday season.

It is a well documented fact, that the holiday season is a source of great stress, and overwhelm a majority of neurotipical adults and children.

Why are we surprised at the negative effects on children with special needs? 

Below are some suggestions to help children cope, in very basic terms for the newly diagnosed families and more importantly, the rest, like our relatives.

Eating during the holidays:

Designate a person that you trust with your life to be the food police. Many relatives have no idea about food sensitivities, allergies, etc., much less the gluten/casein free diet that many of our children are on. I say, if anyone gives Kaitlin something she is not supposed to eat, then they must spend the next 48 hours on duty in my house!

Here is a link to the diet: http://www.glutenfreejungle.com/gluten-free/gluten-free-casein-free-diet-by-julie-mathews/

It is likely that someone, grandma, grandpa or aunt Gertude, will be less than supportive of your efforts to help your child through dietary intervention. They may never say it to you, but, they think you are a "meanie."  When you are not looking they will slip your angel some food that they feel your child is "missing out on" due to your strict guidelines.

Or how about uncle Joe, who can't even stay awake, and has a plate of food on his lap while he snoozes during the football games?

Designate a safe area for your child, a place they can go to escape the overestimulation, make it clear that is is off limits to everyone else.

Stand your ground with relatives that think they are therapists now based on a few articles they read, and now want to try what they have learned on your child. Make it clear that they are not to pressure your child, and that you are leaving it up to the professionals!

Explain to everyone that we must keep the noise down, inside voices please!

It is a good idea to give your child a small snack before the arrival of your guests, that will help keep your child's mood stable and will help with them wanting to eat foods that are not allowed.

Another great idea is to purchase a small toy that is fun for your child and give it to them just before the event, or as I sometimes do, hide a favorite toy a few weeks prior and bring it out that day.

I can't tell you how many times Kaitlin has been sick and lethargic after a holiday party in the early years.  I finally learned my lesson several years ago, and now, I stick to my guns! If they don't like it, then they can host the party next year!

If you are a guest, many of these tips still apply, although a bit easier as you have the ability to watch them, but unfortunately a new set of issues are prevalent!

More on that later!

Good luck my fellow warrior parents! My prayers are with you for a happy and peaceful gathering with cherished friends and family!

Happy holiday season!

Lisa is the owner of Kaitlin's Hideout, a play center for children with autism and a social, support and resource place for parents. www.kaitlinshideout.com